We have already talked about how common it is to have anxiety I depression. Purely logically, given the numbers being bandied about, we've all known or will know someone struggling with these afflictions. But what if that person is one of our loved ones? How can we help?
These are well-intentioned questions, but difficult to answer. Therefore, from my point of view The best thing one can do is to be there for the person who is suffering. Let him know we're there.
By being present, I mean that, since we can never know what the other is thinking or what they need, it is better not to assume things and be there... immersed in the situation.If we're concerned about a loved one's mood, it's best to simply ask if we can help with anything and listen. Truly listen, even if sometimes we don't have an answer. Or even if we can offer nothing but our ears. Listening fully may not seem like much, but it sends a very clear message. Your friend or family member will know they have someone who cares about their story. Someone who gives you time and attention. That's a great gift.
Avoid falling into the "get over it" trap
It's difficult, but listening without the urgency of answering something, without the rush of wanting to help, can end up being more healing for both parties. Because Genuine listening creates space for empathy. And without the rush of wanting to say something, we get rid of the unhelpful cliché of wanting to help by saying a "forget it" either “get over it”.
As stated in the article Here's how you can connect to friends who are depressed (Here's how you can connect with friends who are depressed):
Don't say "just get over it." That's a great idea, we (those of us who are depressed) love it, but there's just one problem: we already thought about that. The inability to "get over it" is depression. Depression is an illness, so it's no different from telling someone with a broken ankle or cancer to "just get over it." Try not to "fix" us; your pressure to act "normal" can make us feel like we're letting you down.
There are many things that can be done to support someone with depression, anxiety, or just a bad streak. But in my opinion, the most important one is Treat that person as what they are: a loved one. Listen genuinely and be willing to engage in honest conversation.
If you're still worried, it may be time to set your own boundaries. Remember that everyone needs support differently. However, being present is the most important step in supporting someone. It will also allow you to better understand that person.
Next week we'll discuss more strategies on how to help a loved one with anxiety or depression.
